There’s one situation almost every one of my clients tells me about.
It’s that moment when they speak French…
…and the person in front of them makes a face.
You know the one:
Confused.
Uncomfortable.
Eyebrows doing a weird little dance.
And here’s the number one question that follows: “What should I do when that happens?” Well… here’s the truth:
You can’t avoid it. Sorry. I know that’s not very reassuring. But hear me out.
1-You can’t control other people’s reactions
That face (the grimace, the frown, the wide eyes) it happens simply because communication isn’t flowing smoothly in that moment.
I know it can feel discouraging.
You’re doing your best. You’re learning, improving, trying to express yourself.
And in return? You get a blank stare. Or worse, a twitchy expression that makes you want to disappear.
I get it.
But here’s what I tell my clients, and what I hope you’ll take with you today:
2-It’s (usually) not about you
In many cultures, making a face like that would be considered rude.
But in French-speaking environments, it often just means: I’m struggling to understand what you’re saying.
That’s all.
It doesn’t mean:
-
“You sound stupid.”
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“You should speak better French.”
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“Why are you even trying?”
Nope. That’s your inner critic talking, not the other person.
The person in front of you is probably just thinking: “Oh no… I’m not sure I understood that.”
It’s about them, not you. Their reaction is more about their own confusion than your French skills.
3-So what can you do?
You can’t stop people from making faces. But you can shift how you interpret those faces.
Next time someone looks confused when you speak French, try telling yourself this: This person is just showing me that communication isn’t smooth right now.
It’s a signal, not a judgment.
And when you see it that way, it becomes easier to stay calm and keep the conversation going.
You might repeat your sentence, simplify it, or reformulate it.
4-Remember: communication involves two people
In any interaction, there are always at least two people.
✌️ Two to speak.
✌️ Two to understand each other.
✌️ Two to move the communication forward.
✌️ Two to succeed and yes, two to fail sometimes.
The responsibility is shared.
It’s not all on you. You don’t have to carry the entire burden.
The other person has a role too. They can rephrase, simplify their sentences, use different words, speak more clearly, or slow down.
So next time you feel like you’re to blame for a misunderstanding, try asking yourself:
- How could the person in front of me have helped make communication smoother?
- How much responsibility do they have in this moment of confusion?
I hope this perspective helps you feel a little lighter and less alone in your journey.
Ready to feel more confident in French — your way?
If you’re learning French and struggling with moments like this (hesitation, self-doubt, or confusion) you don’t have to go through it alone.
Whether it’s pronunciation, finding the right words, putting sentences together… my coaching is 100% personalized to your goals, pace, and personality.
✨ Want to see if we’re a good fit? Book your free discovery call here.
Let’s create a safe, supportive space for you to grow and finally feel confident in French.
